Updated: Mar 21
How often have you defended or passed on something uncomfortable for a certain family member in your family, just because family always has good intentions?
If this sounds like you, this article is for you.
Before I go on, I’ll share a very intrinsic statistic: According to the National Crime Records Bureau (NCRB) 2013 annual report, in 98% of the cases, the perpetrator is known by the victims. (Read Family, Friends, Distant Relatives, Neighbors, and close acquaintance).
The many times you defend a relative, who may or may not be close, to touching a child (read: pull their cheeks, pick them up, etc.) even though the child is uncomfortable, you’re contributing to the culture of undermining consent.
You’re teaching that child that their voice doesn’t matter because the “intention“ is just to caress that child, or that because it’s an elder, it’s right or justified.
You‘re creating an unsafe space for the child and the adult they will grow up to be.
They cannot confide in you because they already see themselves as “deserving it” or “unintentional“ Behaviour.
So, without realizing, you’re contributing to rape culture, and making an unsafe environment for your children.
The next time, you tell a child, ”It’s alright, they’re not going to eat you”, remember you’re telling your child they don’t have ownership of their own body.
Picture source: Amazon.com